I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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