Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
