Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
