His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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