Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
