I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
