Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
