There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
