1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
