I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
