69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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