Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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