HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
