There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
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