its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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