Bisexual people are plain selfish.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
