We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize