Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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