just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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