You really coming over, don't trick.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
My feet surprised me
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