And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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