I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
