i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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