god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
