She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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