then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
This baby is an asshole
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize