I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize