this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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