wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Randomize
