Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
