I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize
