at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize