The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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