you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
