Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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