Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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