can we get nightvision for the apartment?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I don't deserve a penis
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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