Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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