yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Girls should come with a carfax report
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
