Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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