can u get pink eye on your cock?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
