"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Come see our sink grown plant.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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