we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
