i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
