but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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