after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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