I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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