I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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