just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Randomize
