Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
