So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
His hands were made for my vagina.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
