doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize